Courage, choices, reflection, plans, interaction, solitude and relaxation – all part of who we are, our values, attitudes and behavior. They are all pieces of the same puzzle – some larger than others, changing with time but always present in one way or the other.
Be in sync with your surroundings. Your emotions are affected by the world you live in – your physical, emotional and social surroundings. If you’re in sync with that world, you have a much better chance of achieving happiness.
Think about where you currently live. Now, ask yourself whether you’re living in a place where you can be happy. If the answer is yes, then you know that you environment is not the root of your unhappiness. If the answer is no, it might be. Consider a ‘geographic cure” – move or spend time at a place you have longed for, explore and recharge – then decide if the change of your surroundings is necessary for your long term happiness. In any event you may experience something you’ll never forget…like the sunset by the ocean in Sweden…:)
Who am I? What makes me unique? Where am I going in life? Am I comfortable with myself? Solitude is a chance to learn something about yourself. Self-discovery is a process that involves asking and answering the questions above.
Solitude also provides an opportunity for perspective. When you’re caught up in the hassles of day-to-day life, all you can see is what’s directly in front of you – the problem of the moment. If you want to see and appreciate the big picture of what your life’s all about, you have to step back and get a bird’s-eye view – and that’s exactly what solitude allows you to do.
Taking time for yourself is often viewed as selfish and uproductive. Solitude is also uncomortable for many people because they’ve learned to derive their self-esteem from activities initiated by their “other selves” – that is, their efforts to satisfy themselves by satisfying others. But there are important benefits that come from spending time with your “personal self”, that part of you that doesn’t need other people to be happy…:)
I’m in Sweden as you know…where the sun never seems to set…writing this at 10:30 in the evening and the sun is still up! The light, the joy, the optimism about a never ending day (at least until the dark winters kick in 
) reminds me about the following quote from Pat Meehan- “Whether you are in the last chapter of a book, at the later chapters of your life, there’s always another road to lead you in your direction.”
You will always be remembered by the life you lived, the people you touched, the value you added to the world, and the brightness that shined from your light.
Fear is the most destructive element to any undertaking. In most cases, fear can’t be identified by the fearful person. It is not specific, but more of a feeling of emptiness of not knowing where to go or what to do. Fear is having the lack of proper knowledge to make life decisions. Since we are peope of choice, and we live every day, life brings us daily challenges that we choose how to deal with. Self-awareness provides us with the proper knowledge to make informed decisions, leaving us feeling confident rather than scared, secure rather than insecure and lost.
Fear makes us dependant on other people to take care of us, which usually doesn’t work…
When you are accountable for your actions and self-aware you know who you are, what you have to offer, and where you want to go from here…and you have, in the process, eliminated fear from your life. You have replaced fear with adventure, hope, and trust
There are four types of support between people:
1. Emotional support – the “I’m here for you no matter what” kind of support.
2. Informational support – information, guidance, and advice what to do or how to handle situations.
3. Tangible support – helping someone financially, offering a ride, help moving to another house etc.
4. Appraisal support – you need somone to give you honest, frank, constructive feedback about yourself
You need them ALL but you also may find yourself at a point in life where you have no one to confide in – no one to talk to about the important things that are going on in your life, to assist you in overcoming obstacles, or to simply “give you a voice”. If so, you need to begin reaching out…begin by talking to a Life Coach…begin by contacting me. To find out more about a free consultation get in touch with me
On my way over to Sweden I took the time to study some of my passengers prior to embarking on the plane and during the flight itself. The fear of flying takes a lot of different forms – but can you actually spot a nervous person by just observing their physical behavior? Maybe. But if you would ask each one of the passengers what that person is afraid of, you may be surprised to hear that the calmest, “coolest” passenger is the one who is the most afraid…
….and when asking that person what he/she is afraid of, the answer usually is “I don’t know” or “I’m not sure”. Fear is a skeptical feeling like in a horror movie. You just think something bad is going to happen, and you sit on the edge of your seat and wait for the unknown.
Change brings unknowns with it. Managing change is the art of breaking down unknowns into predictable and hopeful visions of the future. How far you can go is as far as you can see. When you become blind with fear, you can’t go anywhere. Through self-accountability, we take on self-awareness, and move forward through self-improvement.
So, going back to the fear of flying – and not knowing exactly what the person is afraid of – you need to break down the perceived fear into predictable and hopeful visions of the future – of the next 8 hours on an airplane, controlled by skilled pilots who know very well that by being proactive, turning problems into challenges, and through accountability, self-awareness, and self improvement (continued ed), these challenges are transformed into opportunities (to in a case of an emergency, respond by using all the known predictables of the emergency to conquer any perceived fear of the unknown).
So, how do you overcome the fear of flying, heights, making a lifechanging decision or a career change? You simply won’t allow any “barriers” into your life:). You choose to transform the barriers, the challenges, into opportunities to conquer, resolve and build your new life, fearless of the unknown…
Really liked this post by Sister Karol Jackowski and thought you would too! So here are four simple steps to real success – simple, powerful but oooh so important…:)
The Four Simple Steps
We often insist that the outside world reflect something at us that tells us who we are…Whether that comes in the form of success or failure is beside the point. To attempt a meaningful life is to embrace that which can be measured only within ourselves. It’s not the snapshot of ourselves, seen through the lens of someone else. It is rather how we feel about the person staring back at us in the mirror and how we feel about life…
How do we get to that point when we embrace the randomness of life?
If everything were linear and predictable, we’d come to a halt. There would be no creativity or evolution or growth. To live is to weave constantly between the known and unknown. But for a lot of us, the impulse is to hide from that which we don’t understand or can’t answer. We lose our reverence for mystery, and instead choose fear, avoidance, and denial. It’s easier to shut down and close out the unknown rather than enter it with a conscious awareness that we don’t have the answers.
It is frightening to trust ourselves to be creative, to find answers or resources or people who can help…
…but if we can start to embrace the feeling of wonder, openness, and curiosity we can get comfortable exploring the vastness of the unanswered questions.
Leading life in a meaningful way requires embracing the empty spaces, the blanks and vastness. Living in the gap, we find ourselves and the meaning of life
Lots have been said by a lot of people over the years about relationships. There are as many opinions about what a good relationship is and what makes it work as there are fishes in the ocean
One thing they all agree upon is that beginning a relationship is easy – sticking to it and making it work over time takes a lot more effort. The relationship edge…are you on it, in it, or over it?
The edges we are talking about are edges, or levels, past which you will not go: tolerance levels, social levels, philosophical levels, and business levels. If someone tries to go past your edge, your tolerance level, you, in som manner, rebuff or deny them. Maybe even dismiss them.
Your compatibility for and with the other person’s edges, combined with your acceptance of the other person’s edges, will determine how the relationship grows or dies.
There are also ethical edges, like your acceptance level for lying, hiding the truth or abusing the trust you placed in the person. Let’s discuss trust for a second – Trust is not a request. Trust is earned. Trust is not spoken. Trust is a feeling.
And then there are emotional edges – how someone reacts when something goes wrong, or how someone responds to an argument and how you feel about their reaction.
You can tolerate almost anything for a short space of time. But each time someone goes over your edge, you become less and less tolerant, either verbally or silently.
TRUST is THE critical element. It’s the glue that binds all the other elements together. Without it, the relationship will fade, diminish, or die.
So, in order to stay succesful in a relationship, personal or business, to make it possible for a relationship of trust to blossom, you must master the following elements of trust:
* Tell the truth
* Deliver what you promise
* Do what you say you will do
* Communicate in a timely manner
* Bring value beyond what you have to do – help others be more succesful
* Be sincere
* Be appreciative
* Be grateful
* Be consistent
* Give trust to others
Easy? No. But consistently trying, working on mastering the elements of trust and be compatible for and with the other persons’s edges, will determine how succesful you are
