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Are we prisoners of our own expectations?

Are we so occupied by adding new “things” in our lives, lose weight, improve our self, strenghten our relationships, find a new partner, become “succesful”, make more money, spend more money…that we lose sight of what really matters?

Or do we chose to be in the moment and to deal with each transition/change as it happens,  without feeling we have to be acknowledged by anyone for what we have, but rather for who we are?

To look inside…do soul searching…rather than focusing our efforts on “improving” our outside – looks, things, “status” measured in money and what others see and thinks.

Isn’t it how we act, what we do for ourselves AND others, that should determine our success? So look inward – do soul searching. Be in the moment. Be mindful. And stop fearing you will “fail” life. Fear not. LIVE!

The Angel in The Room

There’s an angel in my room,

She has her home above my head.

She keeps my calm

And she whispers to me everything I say.

There’s another me inside and

she has the most beautiful soul.

She is love and hope,

and she tells you

how much I care.

There is a spirit, just like a silent wind

touching my skin.

It tickles me

and you smile,

when my angel whispers

she wants you to come,

to feel, to love.

I am here

with everything that makes me whole.

I am here

and I hope,

I hope you are strong,

and that it is her,

the angel in the room,

that you see

when you look…

at me.

[interpretation of Eva Dahlgren’s Ängeln i rummet]

 

Enlight42

 

 

One week in.

The transition into a New Year can be exhilarating, fearful and sometimes tearful…

Whatever feeling you have entering into a New Year it’s always a transition from the past into a future you know nothing about, but one that may present challenges you can prepare for.

To “have the life you want” it’s a good idea to “get the support you need”. A friend, a spouse, a trusted mentor…or a coach.

For more about my 5-step transition signature program “get ready 4change” visit www.CoachLars.com

Happy New Year!

Coaching

A helping hand…coaching

What does life transition mean and what would better managing them entail?

Let’s take a pivotal period in life – transitioning into retirement or semi-retirement. One of the things to look at, as in any transition, is the help needed to build resilience and skills in an individual facing this life changing transition.

Planning, preparing and preventing are three key words that first come to mind, and with a help of a coach you can enter into this new phase of your life confident and with more ease.

During any transition you hit barriers, road blocks, that have prevented you to succeed in the past. One is a behavioral barrier – the way we relate to others. Loneliness, for example, which so significantly impacts health later in life, is one important barrier you may face. Without the support of a partner, peers, family, friend, neighbors, an individual might find it considerably harder to face significant life changes.
On the other hand, reduced independence might prove detrimental because it can diminish the individual’s sense of control of his or her own destiny.

Attitudes also play a pivotal role in any transition. How we choose to enter into a transition. To capitalize on the lessons learnt from their own past experiences (or other’s) the individual is given a platform from where to better prepare for future difficult transitions. The challenge is that it may not be obvious how to do this and guidance from a coach could prove pivotal to the success of the change…to de-traumatize the transition.

Instead of fearing change, embrace it and instigate a change in perception from one of loss and hopelessness,  to one focused on assets that builds resilience.

Other barriers are related to family and social networks, and how to best “intervene” to put you back on track on your journey – your transition – into retirement.

These are a just a few of the challenges/barriers you’ll face in a transition but they give you an idea of what to expect if you choose not to plan, prepare and prevent. i.e. entering into the transition kind of blindfolded.

If you like to get help with a transition like this or any other transition you are facing in life, please get in touch with me to discuss how I can be of help – www.CoachLars.com

“If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn’t ask me , I’d still have to say it.”

George F. Burns

 

1. One thing at a time. Do it right now. Remove distractions.

2. Simplify your schedule. Learn to say no. Leave room for down time and fun.

3. Get moving. Walk, hike, play a sport, go for a run, do yoga.

4. Develop one healthy habit this month. One habit at a time – for example eat fruit and veggies for snack, drink water instead of soda.

5. Do something calming. Find what calms you down. Housework, yard work, meditation, nature walk, reading, taking a bath.

6. Simplify your finances. Automate savings and bill payments and debt payments. Find ways to have fun that don’t involve spending money.

7. Have a blast! Have fun each day, even it’s just for a few minutes. Laugh a lot and often. Smile.

8. Get creative. If you like to write, do so. If you prefer to paint or play music or sketch or make pottery or do interior design or build things…Just do it!

9. Declutter. Take 20-30 minutes to just to through a room, getting rid of stuff you don’t use or need anymore.

10. Be early. Schedule some buffer time to avoid being late – because being late can be very stressful…and if you get somewhere early, meditate!

 

Now your life will probably never be stress-free – I don’t think that’s even desirable, even if is possible, because stress is something that challenges us and helps us grow. At a reasonable level. But when stress gets too high, it causes us to be unhappy and unhealthy.

“It is indeed a radical act of love just to sit down and be quiet for a time by yourself…It is only love that can give us insight into what is real and what is important. And so a radical act of love makes sense, love for life and for the emergence of one’s truest self.” —– Jon Kabat-Zinn

 

To bare our heart (or soul) to someone, to reveal our innermost thoughts…to undress your soul. Check out my illustration – Feelings & Expressions©.

 

Expressions

Expression of Joy – photo by Lars

Begin & end each day with an Expression of Joy! Then you know you have done something that day to not only add value to your own well-being but in the process you have touched so many others – many whom you’ll never see again, some you’ll wake up next to in the morning.

The key to understand joy in the things you see or do is awareness. Awareness is knowing what is happening around you. Self-awareness is knowing what you are experiencing. When you truly accept, choose or take responsibility for your thoughts and your actions, your commitments to them rises and so does your “expression of joy”… Being aware of who you are is also about knowing your interests, attitudes and values – for more about that contact me for a free consultation!

“Take the first step in Faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”

– Martin Luther King

Oscar Wilde said – “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people only exist”

Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them.  Imagine all the wondrous things your mind might embrace if it weren’t wrapped so tightly around your struggles.  Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost.  Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left.

Please take moment to click on this link, read, learn and spread the insight – a few reminders to help motivate you when you need it most:

8 Things to Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

Marie Curie (1867-1934) said:

Nothing in life is to be feared. It s only to be understood”.

The strength, the courage, the faith and hope we need to walk through life and the path we have chosen leave no room for fear…

What if” is always on our minds when trying to understand and explain something we feel don’t go our way…but as a parent, partner and lover the what if doesn’t exist…because we do what it takes to care for our children and the ones we love, we handle the situations as they occur, we don’t try to second guess. We take the necessary steps and act out of love and do everything we can to protect, nurture, develop, support and give them the one and only thing we never should run out of – love. And we tell them “nothing in life is to be feared, only to be understood”…

Why do we then doubt our selves, our path, our way and tell ourselves “what if” when we don’t do that to others…?

In order to understand life we may need a helping hand…As your life coach and transition coach I’ll be there on your journey to learn, to help, to support…to coach. We may know what’s best for the ones we love…make sure though to do same for YOU… challenge yourself, without fear, to answer the following;

“If you could do anything now, with the life you have in front of you, what would it be?”

Then fill out the contact form below with your answer in the comment box, check out my website CoachLars.com and get ready for a free initial consultation how to have the life you want and get the support you need. Understand life, rather than fearing it, and instead of asking yourself “what if”, simply asking yourself “what can I do”.

“…

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Lars – Transition Coach

Lars - Transition Coach

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