Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, M.B.S.R., and Solution-Focused coaching operate out of the understanding that by being aware of, and learn to consciously and systematically work with stress, pain, illness, and the challenges and demands of everyday life, by not turning away from them, but learning to be resilient with and through them, and to be willing to “own them”, YOU, together with your Coach, can design small do-able changes that will help you be more aligned with your beliefs and values.

Let’s look at that definition in more depth and let’s start with Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction. Ralph Waldo Emerson said “What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us.” Mindfulness is about being fully aware of whatever is happening (good or bad) in the present moment, without filters or the lens of judgement. It’s about being aware, and living in the here and now. You may say, that’s fine but how does that reduce my stress level I live with day in and day out…?

What if you could become mindful of your stress reactions and learn to respond to them in a more constructive and harmonious way than for example respond to being stuck in traffic by cursing, becoming agitated, angry, frustrated and honking your horn as if that would open up a lane for you to drive away and escape the bumper to bumper traffic…?

The tension throughout your body, rapid or irregular breathing, gripping the steering wheel so tightly that your knuckles are turning white, or the more hidden impact of anxiety and irritation, such as elevated heart rate, blood pressure, or body temperature CAN be reversed by becoming aware (being mindful) or your physical tension, return to the present moment and release your death grip on the steering wheel, breath mindfully, which will gradually regulate other internal symptoms of stress, including heart rate and blood pressure.

In short, mindfulness allows you to see your experience of being stuck in traffic clearly, and it can help you become more aware of how stress affects you, making you a more active participant in your health and well-being and experience any moment, no matter how difficult or intense, with more balance and peace.

You have just chosen a more “skillful” response to being stuck in traffic…

More to come in future blog posts.

For now, ThinkLARS – Think Life stress relieving Awareness and Resources for your Success!

“If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn’t ask me , I’d still have to say it.”

George F. Burns

 

1. One thing at a time. Do it right now. Remove distractions.

2. Simplify your schedule. Learn to say no. Leave room for down time and fun.

3. Get moving. Walk, hike, play a sport, go for a run, do yoga.

4. Develop one healthy habit this month. One habit at a time – for example eat fruit and veggies for snack, drink water instead of soda.

5. Do something calming. Find what calms you down. Housework, yard work, meditation, nature walk, reading, taking a bath.

6. Simplify your finances. Automate savings and bill payments and debt payments. Find ways to have fun that don’t involve spending money.

7. Have a blast! Have fun each day, even it’s just for a few minutes. Laugh a lot and often. Smile.

8. Get creative. If you like to write, do so. If you prefer to paint or play music or sketch or make pottery or do interior design or build things…Just do it!

9. Declutter. Take 20-30 minutes to just to through a room, getting rid of stuff you don’t use or need anymore.

10. Be early. Schedule some buffer time to avoid being late – because being late can be very stressful…and if you get somewhere early, meditate!

 

Now your life will probably never be stress-free – I don’t think that’s even desirable, even if is possible, because stress is something that challenges us and helps us grow. At a reasonable level. But when stress gets too high, it causes us to be unhappy and unhealthy.

“It is indeed a radical act of love just to sit down and be quiet for a time by yourself…It is only love that can give us insight into what is real and what is important. And so a radical act of love makes sense, love for life and for the emergence of one’s truest self.” —– Jon Kabat-Zinn

 

To bare our heart (or soul) to someone, to reveal our innermost thoughts…to undress your soul. Check out my illustration – Feelings & Expressions©.

 

If you RESPECT me,
I will hear you.

If you LISTEN to me,
I will feel understood.

If you UNDERSTAND me,
I will feel appreciated.

If you APPRECIATE me,
I will know your support.

If you SUPPORT me as I try
new things,
I will become responsible.

When I am RESPONSIBLE,
I will grow to be independent.

In my INDEPENDENCE,
I will respect you and love you all
of my life.

Thank you,

Your Teenager
copyright 2007 Diana Sterling

Strength can be found in so many ways…

Lessons From the End of a Marriage

Several years ago, I taught eighth grade in the gifted program at a school with a population that qualified our suburban location as “inner city.” I had this one little British boy that year that stood out. John couldn’t have been more than four feet tall, the stack of books in his arms frequently bypassing his eyebrows. He was very quiet and gentle and spoke with coolest accent as he shared his brilliant insights. He was safe on our gifted team; we had many kids who fell outside the norm and this group was very accepting of differences.

But that wasn’t necessarily the case with the rest of the school. I worried for my kids when they were in the halls and the lunchroom with the greater population. I feared they would fall sway to bullies or worse.

But John taught me not to worry.

One day, another student was…

View original post 319 more words

 

Expressions

Expression of Joy – photo by Lars

Begin & end each day with an Expression of Joy! Then you know you have done something that day to not only add value to your own well-being but in the process you have touched so many others – many whom you’ll never see again, some you’ll wake up next to in the morning.

The key to understand joy in the things you see or do is awareness. Awareness is knowing what is happening around you. Self-awareness is knowing what you are experiencing. When you truly accept, choose or take responsibility for your thoughts and your actions, your commitments to them rises and so does your “expression of joy”… Being aware of who you are is also about knowing your interests, attitudes and values – for more about that contact me for a free consultation!

 Performance Coach and Consultant

Members of a project bring their “own agenda” with them. In order to steer the project in the direction you, in your role as a PM, want it to go, you need to do “Human Capital Inventory” of the team…by assessing the team members and find out the value each bring to the team, the Do’s and Don’ts of communicating their ideas, and how the knowledge you gain, by having a Coach analyze the assessments, can help you get the project up running fast, efficient and to finish it on time. A, too often, forgotten but very important factor in the outcome of the project and its success – knowing the Human Capital you deal with…

If you are interested in knowing more please contact me to find out how I can help you assess your team!

Find happiness within – then you may share “your happy self” with others 🙂

Remember the best way to succeed in life is to act on the advice we give to others.

Material things never replace the reward of a soul mate who travels on the same path as you. Compatibility, trust and respect pave the road long term…

Lessons From the End of a Marriage

It was a snipe hunt.

I didn’t realize it at the time.

In fact, I didn’t even realize he was searching for something.

I just saw them as simple transactions.

$40 for a shirt here.

$200 for a new phone there.

But he wasn’t looking for a new wardrobe or a new phone.

Not really.

What he was looking for didn’t exist, at least not in material form.

But he didn’t realize that either.

He was on a snipe hunt for happiness.

I’m often questioned about my assertion that they were not obvious signs of my ex husband’s deceptions. There weren’t in the moment. But time has a way of revealing connections and indications, of washing away the clutter and revealing the patterns beneath.

And this is one of those cases.

My ex never expressed discontentment. He never claimed unhappiness or a lack of self-worth. Yet, when I…

View original post 314 more words

Morning FogAn act or a thing is important to you because you make it important. You are in control of what you make important — no one else. What’s important to you is a choice you make…

And that’s all it is. Like choosing vanilla or chocolate. Do you have a reason for choosing one flavor of ice cream or the other? No, you simply choose. What you make important is just like that. No reason. Just choice.

A choice is an either/or deal, because choice is always a relative thing. Do you want this or that? To go here or there?

You will choose what’s most important to you at the time. To help you make choices that forward your progress, simply ask yourself: which choice serves me best right now?

Then you commit…commit to your success…Now, as soon as you’ve made a commitment, you’ll be tested. You will doubt yourself — and your commitment. Don’ worry. (Be happy.) Just re-commit. And you may (I’m sorry — you will) have to do that again, and again, and again.

If you need help finding out what’s most important to you, learn how to commit and have someone backing you up again, and again, and again when you doubt yourself – and your commitment, try me Values Staircase™ for free. Click here for a free 20 minutes consultation!

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Team-Building/Cross-Cultural Trainer

Team-Building/Cross-Cultural Trainer

Lars Bolin, Team-Building/Cross-Cultural Trainer & Project Management Lite Consultant

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