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Imagine your encounter a problem.

Imagine you are equipped with a flashlight.

Awareness (mindfulness) is a bit like the flashlight. Whatever you direct the beam towards becomes visible in the dark. Oftentime you direct its beam toward the problem you encounter – and all the rest is in darkness.

What’s important is to widen the beam of your flashlight. By doing so, coaching may shed light on new and useful areas of you, facets and details become visible that previously had been in the dark. The focus of your awareness (mindfulness) widens. You are able to perceive other parts of your reality, re-describe how you in the past dealt with a similar situation and thus generate more options.

You have become more Mindful about your actions, observing without being caught up in it, and by not identifying with your actions you have set the stage for re-describing your problem, and focusing in on a solution – you have become aware of your expanded choices, you are now Focused on a Solution.

One very central effect of Coaching, and the Transition Coaching I do, consists of your increased self-confidence in your own ability, and trust, to master a difficult situation. Confidence is a prerequisite for taking small steps for change. The coaching creates a framework in which you, my client, become aware of your competencies and resources and are able to access them – you become aware of the competencies you previously used to master situations that were as difficult as the one at hand, re-describe, re-discover, and if you trust in yourself, you will be able to try something new and different to reach your goals (and a solution to your problem).

This is what Mindful Solution-Focused Coaching is, and that’s my approach in my Transition Coaching service I offer.

Get Ready 4 Change. Have the Life you want! Get the support you need.

Visit CoachLars.com for more.

 

Everybody feels fear when dealing with something totally new in life, yet many people are out there ‘doing it’ anyway.

This must mean that fear is not the problem.

It’s how we deal with fear. How we hold the fear.

For some, they hold their fear from a place of power (their fear gives them choice, energy, and action. For others, it creates a state of shut down and they hold their fear from a place of pain (their fear makes them feel helpless, depressed, and stuck).

The cure for our fear lies in saying ‘yes’.

The phrase ‘say yes’ means ‘to agree to’ those things that Life hands to us.

Saying yes means not struggling against, but letting in the opportunities of seeing the World in new ways. On the other hand, saying no means to be a victim. ‘How could this happen to me!’

Saying no means to block, to fight, to struggle against opportunities for growth and challenge. Saying no creates tension, tiredness, wasted energy, upset feelings, – or, worse, it creates a lack of caring.

Say yes to Life. Join in. Move. Act. Write. Read. Stand up. Take a stand. Or do whatever works for you. Get involved in the process.

Become what you want to attract.

Be the kind of person you want to surround yourself with.

Be the change you want to see in others…

…and embrace FEAR in the process.

Enlight57.jpg

Are we prisoners of our own expectations?

Are we so occupied by adding new “things” in our lives, lose weight, improve our self, strenghten our relationships, find a new partner, become “succesful”, make more money, spend more money…that we lose sight of what really matters?

Or do we chose to be in the moment and to deal with each transition/change as it happens,  without feeling we have to be acknowledged by anyone for what we have, but rather for who we are?

To look inside…do soul searching…rather than focusing our efforts on “improving” our outside – looks, things, “status” measured in money and what others see and thinks.

Isn’t it how we act, what we do for ourselves AND others, that should determine our success? So look inward – do soul searching. Be in the moment. Be mindful. And stop fearing you will “fail” life. Fear not. LIVE!

There’s an angel in my room,

She lives in my head.

She keeps my calm

And she whispers to me everything I say.

There’s another me inside my head and

she has the most beautiful soul.

She is love and hope,

and she tells me

how much I care.

 

 

One week in.

The transition into a New Year can be exhilarating, fearful and sometimes tearful…

Whatever feeling you have entering into a New Year it’s always a transition from the past into a future you know nothing about, but one that may present challenges you can prepare for.

To “have the life you want” it’s a good idea to “get the support you need”. A friend, a spouse, a trusted mentor…or a coach.

For more about my 5-step transition signature program “get ready 4change” visit www.CoachLars.com

Happy New Year!

Coaching

A helping hand…coaching

Life Coaching session at a café.

get ready 4 change with Lars – your Transition Coach

Remember that when we talk about goal setting, your attitudes, values and behavior it’s really about making sure that you stay in line with and are being true to your needs, opinions and perception.The distinction between selfishness and self fullness is that self fullness is being true to your needs, opinions and perception without worrying what others think and understanding an important difference that when we disappoint some people we are actually allowing them to find their own strenght.

For more about having the life you want, and getting the support you need, based on your needs, interest and values, go to www.CoachLars.com for a free consulation and to sign up for my 5-step transition signature program – “get ready 4 change”.

What does life transition mean and what would better managing them entail?

Let’s take a pivotal period in life – transitioning into retirement or semi-retirement. One of the things to look at, as in any transition, is the help needed to build resilience and skills in an individual facing this life changing transition.

Planning, preparing and preventing are three key words that first come to mind, and with a help of a coach you can enter into this new phase of your life confident and with more ease.

During any transition you hit barriers, road blocks, that have prevented you to succeed in the past. One is a behavioral barrier – the way we relate to others. Loneliness, for example, which so significantly impacts health later in life, is one important barrier you may face. Without the support of a partner, peers, family, friend, neighbors, an individual might find it considerably harder to face significant life changes.
On the other hand, reduced independence might prove detrimental because it can diminish the individual’s sense of control of his or her own destiny.

Attitudes also play a pivotal role in any transition. How we choose to enter into a transition. To capitalize on the lessons learnt from their own past experiences (or other’s) the individual is given a platform from where to better prepare for future difficult transitions. The challenge is that it may not be obvious how to do this and guidance from a coach could prove pivotal to the success of the change…to de-traumatize the transition.

Instead of fearing change, embrace it and instigate a change in perception from one of loss and hopelessness,  to one focused on assets that builds resilience.

Other barriers are related to family and social networks, and how to best “intervene” to put you back on track on your journey – your transition – into retirement.

These are a just a few of the challenges/barriers you’ll face in a transition but they give you an idea of what to expect if you choose not to plan, prepare and prevent. i.e. entering into the transition kind of blindfolded.

If you like to get help with a transition like this or any other transition you are facing in life, please get in touch with me to discuss how I can be of help – www.CoachLars.com

I feed off inspiration ALL the time. Everything I do is born out of inspiration. Is that bad?

It’s probably the reason why I am not always MOTIVATED… Inspiration is defined as the process of being mentally stimulated to do something, especially something creative. BUT it’s an EXTERNAL force…MOTIVATION is an INTERNAL drive…

SO I need to learn to ACT on everyday inspiration – MOTIVATION does that. It comes from within and propels me to ACT on the inspiration I can find anywhere – IF I choose and am willing to look for it…

I need to let the inspiration turn into motivation to act and allow it to be the accelerant to produce more of my “monster” ideas and plots when I write my stories; or when I help others excel and become more thoughtful, mindful and solution-focused; as a way of living, behaving, and working with others.

And YOU can do the same! Choose to let your inspiration feed your motivation to ACT!

The word coaching is indeed widely used – from management support services, to a wellness coach in our fitness club. For clarity, let me explain what I mean by coaching.

For a moment, think about the arts and crafts of frame making…framing a picture in such a way that it can unfold its full expressivity is an art that few people have mastered. Rembrandt was quoted as saying that during his whole career it was more difficult for him to find an appropriate frame than to paint the picture!

Now, think about coaching as framing a piece of art…As a coach we create a frame (of thought) for the individual or team in which his or her goals, solutions, and first steps can shine. The frame constructed by the coach consists of goal-oriented questions, reinforcing feedback. present listening, and useful summary.

It is the task of coaching to ensure that the individual or team receive the appropriate frame. But just like the frame maker, the coach would never start actively creating the picture.

ThinkLARS – Life stress relieving Awareness and Resources for your Success 

A helping hand...coaching

A helping hand…coaching

Being Focused on the Solution of a situation rather than the cause – the problem – is the driving force behind SF coaching.

The idea being that it’s more useful to focus attention on building solutions for problems than on analyzing causes of problems, trusting that any person is competent to solve his or her own problems, but may need help finding solutions that fit his or her unique circumstances; individualized solutions that are really owned by the coachee/performer/team. 

  • Problem talk is negative, solution talk is positive and future focused.
  • The future is both created and negotiable. People are not locked into a set of behaviors based on history and problems of the past.
  • If it isn’t broken, don’t fix it. If it works, do more of it.
  • The solution is not necessarily related to the problem. Talking about and acting upon what will be different is the focus, not uncovering why the problem occurred.
  • No problem happens all the time; there are always exceptions that can be utilized. These exceptions can be used to create the solution.
  • Small steps can lead to big changes. Being solution focused means using a series of small manageable steps to build the path to a Solution.
  • Again, problem talk is negative, solution talk is positive and future focused.

ThinkLARS – Life stress relieving Awareness and Resources for your Success!

 

...being positive and future focused

Being Solution Focused…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mindfulness is awareness of, and an alert observing of your thoughts, emotions, body sensations, desires, memories, images, personality dynamics, attitudes, motivation, behavior, etc.

When you are mindful of something, you are observing it, not caught up in it and not identified with it. With people, you become more settled into being fully there with them, more peacefully relaxed in awareness of them and you and what’s happening, less identified with pleasant or unpleasant reactions that arise, less caught up in the past or future or sense of needing to make something happen. We can feel it immediately when someone else is mindfully present with us; similarly, others can feel it when you are that way yourself.

Hmm...being in the presence

Hmm…being in the presence

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ThinkLARS – Life stress relieving Awareness and Resources for your Success!

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