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“Take the first step in Faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”

– Martin Luther King

Oscar Wilde said – “To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people only exist”

Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them.  Imagine all the wondrous things your mind might embrace if it weren’t wrapped so tightly around your struggles.  Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost.  Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left.

Please take moment to click on this link, read, learn and spread the insight – a few reminders to help motivate you when you need it most:

8 Things to Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

I posted this blog back in the fall of 2013. Thought it was worthwhile to repeat it now in the beginning of a new year. We all need to be reminded about what matters in a relationship – remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other…

A personal note related to above…Back in 2001, I became a stay-home-dad and had the great fortune for the next 10 years to be part of my kids every day fun laughter, tears, learning and challenges. I experienced first hand that is it NO cliche – it really is the small things in life that matters. It is also not what you do out of need – the volunteering I experienced in schools wasn’t done out of need…it was done out of love. And the reward wasn’t money in your pocket – it was an investment, a deposit in our heart and soul.

Now, looking back at those years and seeing the love and appreciation in the, by now, young women that used to be my kids running around, pulling my hand, urging me to come and play, give them a hand, read and feed them not only food but knowledge and experience, I know it was all worth it. And I know it wasn’t necessarily that they NEEDED me but rather that they got what the LOVE they wanted to grow up, establishing their own personal interests, attitudes and values – a belief system that will follow them through life.

So, remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other 🙂

Came across the following quote when studying cognitive behavioral coaching techniques – it’s a powerful reminder that we choose our attitude…and the way we look at a situation, regardless how hopeless it may seem…

Viktor Frankl, an eminent psychiatrist who survived Auschwitz, wrote:

” We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s way.”

 

Some thoughts I actually put down for my daughters’ journeys into adulthood 🙂

We always have a choice.

Make sure you always work with others because others, regardless of your feelings towards them, teach you to listen, appreciate, and accept who YOU are, and strive to be.

Be aware of your own potential, skill sets and make sure to sharpen them – then find others with skills that compliment yours…and together you WILL achieve more.

Life is not a journey you travel on alone – make friends, good friends, who will not only compliment you and support you but also tell you when you are wrong…

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Remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other…

A personal note related to above…Back in 2001, I became a stay-home-dad and had the great fortune for the next 10 years to be part of my kids every day fun laughter, tears, learning and challenges. I experienced first hand that is it NO cliche – it really is the small things in life that matters. It is also not what you do out of need – the volunteering I experienced in schools wasn’t done out of need…it was done out of love. And the reward wasn’t money in your pocket – it was an investment, a deposit in our heart and soul.

Now, looking back at those years and seeing the love and appreciation in the, by now, young women that used to be my kids running around, pulling my hand, urging me to come and play, give them a hand, read and feed them not only food but knowledge and experience, I know it was all worth it. And I know it wasn’t necessarily that they NEEDED me but rather that they got what the LOVE they wanted to grow up, establishing their own personal interests, attitudes and values – a belief system that will follow them through life.

So, remember that your best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other 🙂

Electronic Dance Music

Electronic Dance Music

It’s not WHAT we do, or HOW we do it…it is WHY we do it that matters. Electronic Dance Music is defined as “music being produced with the intention of it being heard in the context of a continuous DJ set; progressing from one to the next via a synchronized segue or mix” . EDM is all about WHY – there are few rules about WHAT is mixed or HOW it is being mixed or danced, or even if there are it’s not the reason why the audience like it – it is all about WHY it is being followed by so many, WHY it is such a movement among young people of all backgrounds and WHY the creators of the Electronic Dance Music has been so successful marketing the concept.

And the answer lies in the acronym itself – EDM – Emotional, Direct & Motivational. It’s music that inspire the audience to dance, have fun, party, be happy and get together.

When I coach I stress the importance of a person’s interests, attitudes and values (the WHY behind the actions we take) and there’s a clear reason for WHY Electronic Dance Music has become such a movement – it’s music that hit the cord of young people – and old as well – who are open to the idea that throughout life we do things, not because we were told WHAT or HOW to do things but because we were told, or even better experienced, WHY we do them…

In marketing, the most successful companies are the ones who do not emphasize WHAT they do, HOW they do it but WHY they provide a service or product…the EDM of marketing – the Emotional, Direct and Motivational connection they make with their audience, their buyers. Same emotional, direct and motivational connection, Electronic Dance Music makes with its audience. And the same reason why we, in general, like to do things, live our lives and share our experiences with others with similar interests, attitudes and values – and to experience the emotional, direct and motivational thrill of being.

Fear is the most destructive element to any undertaking. In most cases, fear can’t be identified by the fearful person. It is not specific, but more of a feeling of emptiness of not knowing where to go or what to do. Fear is having the lack of proper knowledge to make life decisions. Since we are peope of choice, and we live every day, life brings us daily challenges that we choose how to deal with. Self-awareness provides us with the proper knowledge to make informed decisions, leaving us feeling confident rather than scared, secure rather than insecure and lost.

Fear makes us dependant on other people to take care of us, which usually doesn’t work…

When you are accountable for your actions and self-aware you know who you are, what you have to offer, and where you want to go from here…and you have, in the process, eliminated fear from your life. You have replaced fear with adventure, hope, and trust 🙂

“Life is like a combination lock; your job is to find the right numbers, in the right order, so you can have anything you want.” – Brian Tracy

This morning I’m back in New York City again, the city that never sleeps but also the city with a touch of fresh air. Fresh air you say!? Well, today is actually Earth Day and I guess you could argue that the New York city air is far from “fresh”…may be, but although not clean, it certainly feels refreshing and inspirational to be around people with “fresh” ideas, sitting at the classical Caffe Reggio (the home of the “original cappuccino brought to America by Domenico Parisi, the original owner of Caffe Reggio, in 1927) surrounded by students, artists and writers with a feel of being at a street cafe in Montmartre, Paris 🙂

Especially in New York City, and any other big cities (like Paris for example), people are constantly searching…searching for what is right for them. Work, relationship, life…Yes, NYC is a jungle and it’s easy to get lost, easy to lose control and easy to get off track. But it’s also a place of opportunities, opportunities to find your way back onto the road you have chosen to travel on – Your Road Map to Success!

Like Brian Tracy said – the combinations are many, your job is to find the right numbers, the ones that work for you. Help, guidance and support is there to be found – you just need to make an effort looking for it and wanting it.

Enjoy Earth Day today and wherever you may be at this moment remember that we are all part of the Circle of Life. So do the best you can today, and every day, to unlock the combination of your lock finding out what’s important to you , in the right order so that you can have anything you want.

For more information how a Life Coach can help, support and guide you on your Road Map To Success, visit www.CoachLars.com.

Values are like a compass for your life which helps you recognize who you really are. That’s what having and knowing your values is like. Values are your personal motivators, they’re what make you tick and the greatest tragedy is that most people go through life not even knowing they’ve got values, let alone what they are!

They are your own internal compass and when you pay attention to them, they give you direction in life. Values are not attitudes or beliefs, though they do live in the same brain (the emotional brain/limbic system).

Attitudes are things that are linked to our emotions and behaviors. It’s the way a person views something or tends to behave towards it, often in an evaluative way. It’s the glasses we wear and through which we choose to see the world and people around us.

Beliefs on the other hand is an idea, a principle accepted as true, especially without proof. If your attitudes are the glasses you wear and through which you choose to view the world and people around you, your beliefs are your truth or your story of the world and people around you. For example do you believe the world is flat or round, do you believe in Santa Claus? The key with beliefs is that they are not necessarily correct. Think about what your beliefs are doing for you? Are they supporting you to achieve your goals or holding you back..?

An attitude is something more than a belief, as it is an emotional expression.

Beliefs can form attitudes and attitudes can form beliefs.

Ultimately, attitudes and beliefs can help or hinder us and affect how we behave and how much of our potential we use. All attitudes can be rewired to form new, healthier attitudes if we choose to do this. The key is to get underneath the ones that undermine us (by first raising conscious awareness of them), weed them out and replace them with healthy supportive beliefs and attitudes 🙂

So, values, attitudes and beliefs have a powerful connection with our thoughts, feelings and behaviors and how we perform.

Consider a tree with values representing the roots of who we are, the beliefs being the trunk, attitudes being the main branches with the leaves being our behaviors and actions.

Values are an intrinsic part of who we are, and our core values are far less changeable than our beliefs and attitudes.

Make sure you know your internal compass (values) on your road to success in life! By identifying your core values, the glasses you wear and choose to look at the world through (attitudes) and the truth you see (beliefs) you are able to work on your behaviors and actions! Get your free consultation today! Find out more about yourself and your strengths, using your internal compass on your Road Map to Success. But don’t take my word for it – check out what others have to say!

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Lars – Transition & Retirement Coach

Certified Retirement Coach

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